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Blah.
Work is eating my life.
For real.
I'm working all the time now... I've time for nothing else. And to make matters worse, I'm living at my grandmother's house (because it's closer to the workplace, and easier to get to). Not that it's a bad thing exactly... it's just... there is no computer access. Yeah. Meaning, I'm behind on everything... from fics, to art, and most importantly - what is going on with my friends. I feel so terrible that I'm never around... I'm sure alot has been goin on with you guys, and I wish I could be around more to be of some use...
*sigh*
Oh, and you guys remember Nick? The cute Red Cap? Weeelll... I've got a story... >_<;
It happened yesterday, it was lunch, and when I got to the lunch room, lo and behold! There's Nick. Just Nick. As in, no one else is in the room except the two of us. NO ONE.
Anyways, I picked up my bag, sat down and started to get my stuff out. He looked at me a couple times before saying "Hey.", to which I oh so eloquently replied, "Hey".
Nick: "You new here?"
Me: "Yeah"
Nick: *nods*
Me: *rumages around in bag a bit*
Nick: "So... how long you've been here?"
Me: "A week and a bit..." *has pulled out book, and is pretending to flip through pages*
Nick: "Cool..."
Me: *nods and attempt small smile*...
AND THEN THERE WAS SILENCE.
It was my turn to try for conversation, I know it was... but I couldn't think of anything else to say. At all. So we sat there for close to twenty minutes in silence. Him finishing off his lunch, and me pretending to read - while we bothnot-so covertly tried sneaking glances at each other.
It was so ackward.
FUCK.
I ruined it! I RUINED IT!
I should've said soemthing, I know I should have! WTF! I wasted a golden opportunity to get to know him, to.. anything! AND I FUCKING BLEW IT! The odds of us having lunch together is slim as it is, but have lunch together - alone?! Unheard of! Un-fucking-heard of! Who knows when the next time that we converse will be?! SHIT.
SHITFUCKSHITSHITSHITFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
GOD DAMN IT
*bangs head on desk repeatedly*
I am so hopeless...
Work is eating my life.
For real.
I'm working all the time now... I've time for nothing else. And to make matters worse, I'm living at my grandmother's house (because it's closer to the workplace, and easier to get to). Not that it's a bad thing exactly... it's just... there is no computer access. Yeah. Meaning, I'm behind on everything... from fics, to art, and most importantly - what is going on with my friends. I feel so terrible that I'm never around... I'm sure alot has been goin on with you guys, and I wish I could be around more to be of some use...
*sigh*
Oh, and you guys remember Nick? The cute Red Cap? Weeelll... I've got a story... >_<;
It happened yesterday, it was lunch, and when I got to the lunch room, lo and behold! There's Nick. Just Nick. As in, no one else is in the room except the two of us. NO ONE.
Anyways, I picked up my bag, sat down and started to get my stuff out. He looked at me a couple times before saying "Hey.", to which I oh so eloquently replied, "Hey".
Nick: "You new here?"
Me: "Yeah"
Nick: *nods*
Me: *rumages around in bag a bit*
Nick: "So... how long you've been here?"
Me: "A week and a bit..." *has pulled out book, and is pretending to flip through pages*
Nick: "Cool..."
Me: *nods and attempt small smile*...
AND THEN THERE WAS SILENCE.
It was my turn to try for conversation, I know it was... but I couldn't think of anything else to say. At all. So we sat there for close to twenty minutes in silence. Him finishing off his lunch, and me pretending to read - while we both
It was so ackward.
FUCK.
I ruined it! I RUINED IT!
I should've said soemthing, I know I should have! WTF! I wasted a golden opportunity to get to know him, to.. anything! AND I FUCKING BLEW IT! The odds of us having lunch together is slim as it is, but have lunch together - alone?! Unheard of! Un-fucking-heard of! Who knows when the next time that we converse will be?! SHIT.
SHITFUCKSHITSHITSHITFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
GOD DAMN IT
*bangs head on desk repeatedly*
I am so hopeless...
no subject
Date: 2006-05-05 03:06 am (UTC)Aww, I'm so sorry you feel bad about what happened with Nick. I hope there is a "next time", and I hope it goes a lot better. ::hugs::
(I'm hoping that my icon ::points up:: cheers you up a little bit. ::hugs::)
no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 02:15 am (UTC)Yep, I feel much peppier now... and suddenly craving some Anakin Skywalker O_o;
no subject
Date: 2006-05-07 04:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-05 03:41 am (UTC)and, well, hey, it happens. but you can always try again. Just think, maybe';s hes thinking the same thing right now XD
no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 02:17 am (UTC)*laughs pitifully*
Yeaaah.... I'm really not >_>; ~ Sometimes I feel as though I'm just imagining it all because why would someone as cute as him be attracted to someone like me?
*self-confidence hits an all time low*
*echoing thud*
T_T
no subject
Date: 2006-05-07 04:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-05 03:28 pm (UTC)Anyways, when I clicked on the cut I was expecting something worse. Don't worry. At least now you've introduced yourselves, so when you pass by him next you can say "hi" and not worry about the response "who are you". I hate meeting new people, I always feel uncomfortable, and I hate the silences. When I'm really desperate, I (sadly)freak, and resort to saying: "What's your favourite colour?" Yeah. I know. Silence is way better.
*pat on back*
no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 02:18 am (UTC)XD
*sighs and allows himself to be pat*
Meeting new people is the worst, especially for us shy people... *clings to you*
no subject
Date: 2006-05-05 07:42 pm (UTC)And don't worry so much about not being around enough to your liking. We all still love you. ~_^
no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 02:19 am (UTC)Oh, you know you loves me!
*glomps*
no subject
Date: 2006-05-05 09:56 pm (UTC)ok sorry... cudnt help it.. as i was reading it i could imagine some boy (whose appearance i dint know so made up) and dark long haired yue having that supposed-to-be-a-conversation. oh mannn i won't lie to yea, when i was reading it i was on the edge of my seat saying DILRAJ SAY SOMETHING! usually when someone says hi you're supposed to look at them while talking not the book.. hey what are you playin hard to get?
i am not making you feel any better am i.. ok how abt this you always said you are a person who's shy at first but then very open after.. now the first is gone. you get to be a step closer to the after.
next time, say hi to him or smile or something... acknowledge him in some way and dont worry coz if its meant to be, there WILL be a "next time."
no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 02:21 am (UTC)Though it was more of a curt hey, he said "Hey dude" and grinned at me... so that's a plus?
:P
And NO, I'm NOT playing hard to get, considering how easy I am to get (if you catch my drift ^_~ )
I hope I can be more open... but the shyness is still there >_<;; ~ It'll go away with time... I guess... u__u;
no subject
Date: 2006-05-05 11:14 pm (UTC)Verbal Constipation is the root of all evil.
But, the good news is, there's a good chance I'm going to come and glomp you!! XD
no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 02:20 am (UTC)*hugs back*
AND OMG YOU BETTER COME UP HERE AND SMEX ME UP! >D
no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 02:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-06 11:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-07 12:59 am (UTC)